Remind Me.
"When I lose My way and I forget my name. Remind me who I am. In the mirror all I see is who I don't wanna be. Remind me who I am. In the lonliest places, when I can't remember what grace is. When my heart is like a stone and I'm running far from home.
Remind me who I am. When I can't recieve your love, afraid I'll never be enough. Remind me who I am. If I'm your beloved, can you help me believe it. Tell me once again who I am to you. Who I am to you. Tell me lest I forget who I am to you. That I belong to you."
In the past weeks two truths have come come to light in the midst of reflection, studies, and conversation:
(1) I want to decide what platform and how God will use me.
(2) I want the world to look at me and find value in who I am and what I do.
From books, to gymnastics meets, to testimonies, to Sports-Center....I am in awe of the amazing people in this world. Day after day, I read, see, or hear about the works and talents of so many absolutely amazing people in this world.
Bethany. Immaculee. Katie. Tim. Cherri. Ashlei. Blake. Philip. Ruth. Mark. Joy. Friends. Brothers. Sisters. Athletes. Missionaries. Abolitionists. I look at the work that God has led them to, the platform He has given them...and on the surface I bubble with joy and excitement, but underneath I rot with jealousy. I am at a loss for why it couldn't be me...my calling, my platform, my hand in changing the world.
I was born into a world of boys. And sports. It's what I've known, and loved, for all my life (sports that is, just to clarify...boys would in there, just somewhere after sports, milk, Shamu, and firefighters). From a playground match of 'steal the bacon' to competitive swimming, street hockey bouts on the cul-de-sac to catch in between innings...being active, being competitive was what I did. While I would never admit it (for fear of failure; a fear that permeates throughout much of my life)...I always dreamed I would be the next Jenny Thompson, Janet Evans, or Penny Haynes. I dreamed of being a world-class athlete...one that won medals, had followers (and haters), and little girls wanting to 'swim in my stroke-prints'. A dream that I still, to this day, blame God for 'taking' from me; if He only would have given me a 'chance', I could have done great things for Him.
While studying this week, I heard His whisper..."You dream of being an athlete who loves and serves God and people, but I created you to be a lover and servant of God who loves people and athletics. It is not the world you have come to save, it God you were born to glorify. Stop pursuing 'things' in order to serve God, and start pursuing God in order that 'things' will find their place in your life."
Most days, I look in the mirror and have forgotten who I am and can only see who I don't want to be...not because I don't love life or work or friends, but because it's not where I want to be. I what to be out there...where all the amazing people are. With books. And shows. And contracts. And callings.
Remind me of who I am God.
I am free; there is nothing holding me back.
I am your workmanship; created for a special purpose unique to me.
I am your ambassador; your voice to very special people.
I am your beloved; whom you gave your life fully for.
I am the daughter of the High King; a heir to the kingdom.
I belong to You.
I find my arrogance appalling, but am refreshed with an opportunity to share honestly. I may never attend an Olympic Games, but I must realize my golden purpose. I may never have a million fans across the globe, but I must realize I have an ever-present friend. I may never get all that I 'want', but I must realize have a patient and loving Father who knows exactly what I 'need'.
Do you ever wish for 'so much more'...?? Ever hope for a 'better future'...?? Think God could do so many more and greater things with your life, if He'd just...
Please pray with me; that God would remind us daily of who WE ARE, to Him...and just how wholly amazing that is.
Remind me who I am. When I can't recieve your love, afraid I'll never be enough. Remind me who I am. If I'm your beloved, can you help me believe it. Tell me once again who I am to you. Who I am to you. Tell me lest I forget who I am to you. That I belong to you."
In the past weeks two truths have come come to light in the midst of reflection, studies, and conversation:
(1) I want to decide what platform and how God will use me.
(2) I want the world to look at me and find value in who I am and what I do.
From books, to gymnastics meets, to testimonies, to Sports-Center....I am in awe of the amazing people in this world. Day after day, I read, see, or hear about the works and talents of so many absolutely amazing people in this world.
Bethany. Immaculee. Katie. Tim. Cherri. Ashlei. Blake. Philip. Ruth. Mark. Joy. Friends. Brothers. Sisters. Athletes. Missionaries. Abolitionists. I look at the work that God has led them to, the platform He has given them...and on the surface I bubble with joy and excitement, but underneath I rot with jealousy. I am at a loss for why it couldn't be me...my calling, my platform, my hand in changing the world.
I was born into a world of boys. And sports. It's what I've known, and loved, for all my life (sports that is, just to clarify...boys would in there, just somewhere after sports, milk, Shamu, and firefighters). From a playground match of 'steal the bacon' to competitive swimming, street hockey bouts on the cul-de-sac to catch in between innings...being active, being competitive was what I did. While I would never admit it (for fear of failure; a fear that permeates throughout much of my life)...I always dreamed I would be the next Jenny Thompson, Janet Evans, or Penny Haynes. I dreamed of being a world-class athlete...one that won medals, had followers (and haters), and little girls wanting to 'swim in my stroke-prints'. A dream that I still, to this day, blame God for 'taking' from me; if He only would have given me a 'chance', I could have done great things for Him.
While studying this week, I heard His whisper..."You dream of being an athlete who loves and serves God and people, but I created you to be a lover and servant of God who loves people and athletics. It is not the world you have come to save, it God you were born to glorify. Stop pursuing 'things' in order to serve God, and start pursuing God in order that 'things' will find their place in your life."
Most days, I look in the mirror and have forgotten who I am and can only see who I don't want to be...not because I don't love life or work or friends, but because it's not where I want to be. I what to be out there...where all the amazing people are. With books. And shows. And contracts. And callings.
Remind me of who I am God.
I am free; there is nothing holding me back.
I am your workmanship; created for a special purpose unique to me.
I am your ambassador; your voice to very special people.
I am your beloved; whom you gave your life fully for.
I am the daughter of the High King; a heir to the kingdom.
I belong to You.
I find my arrogance appalling, but am refreshed with an opportunity to share honestly. I may never attend an Olympic Games, but I must realize my golden purpose. I may never have a million fans across the globe, but I must realize I have an ever-present friend. I may never get all that I 'want', but I must realize have a patient and loving Father who knows exactly what I 'need'.
Do you ever wish for 'so much more'...?? Ever hope for a 'better future'...?? Think God could do so many more and greater things with your life, if He'd just...
Please pray with me; that God would remind us daily of who WE ARE, to Him...and just how wholly amazing that is.
Comments